AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
