Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I think I sprained my soul last night
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
