Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
