so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Dear god my vagina.
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