Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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