i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
