She said her name was "party"
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize