so that wasnt chicken after all
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
