There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
