I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize