I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
