No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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