Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
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