Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
