is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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