You're completely useless in the revolution.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Randomize
