Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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