i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Randomize
