Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize