I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
