He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
