I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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