bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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