a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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