i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
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