Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize