the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Randomize
