Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
