After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
