Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
