this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
