he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
