Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
