I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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