Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Dick very happy bro
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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