If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
oh god was she eating orange peels again
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
