Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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