Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I had to cum in my sink.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
