My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Buhtt sex?
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
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