she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I currently don't understand fingers.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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