I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
