currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
