Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
She announced her abortion via fbk
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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