Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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