You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
