Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
