Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
