You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
