if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
