What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
her vagine was all disorganized.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
